In order for there to be tension in your personal statement, it will help to describe a highly charged incident, part of a particularly difficult period in your life. Whatever it was, you will maintain your reader's interest for that much longer. The example below shows perfect tension and suspense build up _ "When the airmail letter arrived bearing an American stamp, I knew immediately, it was from my university with my degree results, and I tore it open as excitedly as if it were a birthday present. With trembling fingers, I took out the sheets of thin blue paper _ and my heart started to pound as I began to read."
A while ago, I was asked to take a critical look at a personal statement, which spanned the student's life from age two to eighteen. The personal statement made gripping reading but was far too long and the student had not been selective enough in the abundance of material she choose from. The word count ran to 1귔 words _ far too long for a personal statement. The task of reducing your personal statement can be enthusiastically undertaken, but the problem is that you need to look at your original brainstormed ideas to organise your material for the selection process. The only criterion you need to apply at this stage is this incident of sufficient interest to the admission officer.