Another problem often discovered at this stage is the presence of too many short sentences and paragraphs that seem choppy and abrupt. As a solution, try to develop these into longer, more graceful sentences. Formal writing generally utilizes longer sentences, so try using more compound and complex sentences. Using long sentences add flavor and variety to your writing, not to mention the fact that it also showcases your proficiency with words. You can also consider the word_count limit at this time and begin omitting unnecessary details that may only bog down your essay and make it unfocused. How can information be "condensed" while keeping the essence and maintaining the relevance of the essay? You can remove adverbs and excessive modifiers, as well as transform detailed sections to general statements.
This is the statement where there is a chance to clarify the distinctions between applicants whose academic records are quite similar and makes you unique. It is a forum for candidates to express how factors outside their school environment have improved or hampered their ability to increase existing academic and intellectual prospects.