The introduction _ This may sound strange but saving the introduction for last is more advantageous than it may seem. Having written the body and the conclusion, you are now in the best position to tell the reader, as creatively as possible, what they are reading into. In the introduction, explain your thesis statement and how you are going to affirm it without being too specific. Do not use typical introductions such as"This essay is about..." or "The topic of this essay is..." or "I will now show that..." It is not only boring but also uncreative.
2. BE POSITIVE. Your statement should not sound staged or stilted, but enthusiastic and motivated. Consider topics which would be easiest for you to put descriptive words to. Your personal statement is a testament of your passions and your earnestness, the image you want the reviewing committee to see of you. That image should never be negative, bland, or boring; you want the committee to say, on reading your statement, we'd like to meet this person. Avoid using "waffle" words (words which qualify your experiences and commitment) such as "rather", "quite", "somewhat", or "probably". Waffle words tend to give the impression the writer is unsure of him or herself; with the personal statement, all writing should be positive and express confidence and directness.