When you choose someone to look over your admission essay, you should choose someone who will not be afraid to tell you like it is. In other words, don't just show it to your mom or your significant other. When you show it to someone who isn't afraid to give you criticisms then you are doing yourself a giant favor. Remember, those who review it when you turn it in will be looking not only for the good, but the bad as well. If your statement is not among the good, then it will get weeded out with the rest of the bad.
3 _ Demonstrate ambition _ What is your end goal? Do you want to become a solicitor or a barrister? Do you want to study law as an academic? Or do you want to go into law for the great skills it teaches you? Law schools will want to to know where your end goal lies. If you have your heart set on becoming a solicitor, and this passion comes across in your personal statement, it shows a great drive to succeed. And that's obviously something which will be beneficial during your degree.